darkness and bikes

This blog started after I read Maddy's column about losing electricity in her apartment, and because I wanted to write about how I like speeding my bike Renata through Somerville at night (always armed with the appropriate bike safety equipment).

Biking often feels like an opportunity to set yourself apart.  You're more than a non-car, you're a rebel motor.  And you get to swerve and dodge, and make hand signals, all in the name of safety and environmental politics. 

A few weekends ago I went out at night to the fire escape at Ilana's work in ny.  If you climb up several floors, you will come upon a Small Uncharted Land (the "roof").  It's a soft asphalt expanse, and there are curves, rises, and jumps like in a skateboarding park.  And there are bright skyscrapers towering all around. 

The dark is so much better than the daytime.   There are whole worlds out there that are brought into relief by darkness.   Breezing through the wet streets of Somerville at night is so much better than in the vanilla-winter sun.

When it gets to be this season and certain things are offered to you, like falling in love, warm light, showers and baths, sex, you can start getting dependent pretty fast.  And having any of that taken away can be devastating.  It was something you promised yourself you would have.  As Ilana has put it: "I'm leaving work after dark, my whole day is already over. But at least I have this."

Biking has largely saved me from this feeling recently.  It doesn't make me more cynical about love and showers, it just makes me realize I need them less than I thought.  It also leaves me in an eyes-half-shut, wild hair kind of feeling that's a lot better than some recent love and showers that I have had.  I end up thinking less about loss and more about how I'm an explorer, dirt on my face, sweat on my brow, weaving through black wet streets, waving an rebel motor flag as I go.             

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